Hey, have you guys noticed that salvaged Hershey's poured over 100 calorie Kettle Corn tastes a little like bitter divorce? Just me? M'okay.
DolciSogni from Under a pile of scripts.
4 hours, 53 minutes agoView original
6
Threw away chocolate syrup this morning in a defiant act of lifestyle change. Just gonna dust off these coffee grounds here. Mmselfloathing.
DolciSogni from Under a pile of scripts.
4 hours, 56 minutes agoView original
3
The thing about dumping a huge heap of cinnamon into your coffee is that it ruins your coffee.
DolciSogni from Under a pile of scripts.
5 hours, 31 minutes agoView original
1
Being knocked senseless has it's perks. No, wait. No, it does not.
6 hours, 33 minutes agoView original
2
@phyllisstein have we met at a MTN? I'm usually the girl lifted up on shoulders for the Defying Gravity key change. #professionalfruitfly
14 hours, 49 minutes agoView original
1
If I was a midget with epilepsy I'd totally open a pizza joint. What would I name it? Little Seizures. *thankyoupleasetipyourwaiter*
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
2
Death by snow. I want to punch the earth in the face.
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
1
I love kicking the dirty, nasty snow out from behind my tires in the morning. That is not a euphemism.
2 weeks, 4 days agoView original
1
Latin Robot - Finitimus Prime
2 weeks, 5 days agoView original
1
Crooked Lender Robot - Sub-Optimus Prime
2 weeks, 5 days agoView original
1
Looks like we'll be playing 'Don't inhale your vomit' again tonight.
2 weeks, 5 days agoView original
2
If she should sleep thru the rest of Winter, go to pg 69. If you think she should find a tower and buy a gun? Go to pg OMGIHATELIFERIGHTNOW
2 weeks, 5 days agoView original
1
Van Johnson was alive until today. Who knew?
3 weeks, 2 days agoView original
1
F: "Anything that humiliates a chihuahua just SCREAMS Christmas to me.They used to be wolves for shit's sake. Talk about downwardly mobile."
3 weeks, 2 days agoView original
1
To Whitening Strips: Well, okay, I guess pulpy, bleeding gums *do* make my teeth look whiter in comparison. You got me there. Also: OWOWOW
3 weeks, 3 days agoView original
1
Friday-me is going to hate Thursday-me for all the sitting around and not-preparing that's going on here. I'm up to my neck in not-preparing
3 weeks, 4 days agoView original
3
Man, I so got my hair to look like M.I.A. today. Less 'ironic 90's street-y' but more '5 years since it's even sent a postcard to a comb-y.'
3 weeks, 5 days agoView original
1
Tonight: To drive is to die. Share and enjoy.
3 weeks, 6 days agoView original
1
I like tits.
3 weeks, 6 days agoView original
2