Ev'ning, sir. Ah received a complaint that this vicinity was out of toilet paper? [beatbox bad techno] [hand him TP while unsexily gyrating]
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 hours, 29 minutes agoView original
10
Answer: Because you're the type of idiot that would buy this book. Question: http://is.gd/eBFY
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
14 hours, 53 minutes agoView original
11
A primer: @phylhrmnix is pronounced fill-har-MON-icks; he is my best friend, evil twin, and favorite TwILF; and it's his birthday today ♥
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 day, 12 hours agoView original
2
Oops, meant to tweet that under my other handle, @Remiel.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 day, 21 hours agoView original
5
Got small shelf at work with pre-written answers to common questions I get. Now, I can just say "let me pull an answer out of my Ask Rack!"
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 day, 22 hours agoView original
31
@communicatrix Alternately: How do you know you're not watching a Kosher movie?
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 days, 2 hours agoView original
1
Come visit us in rapidly gentrifying Bed-Stuy! Bed-Stuy: You Almost Never Hear Any Gun Shots At Night™
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 days, 20 hours agoView original
5
Really, Flickr? I'm the only person who's used the tag "Internet Pretty"? I think a few people need to make a resolution to be more honest.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
3 days, 9 hours agoView original
14
Found a roach in the fridge. After the cursing and before the killing and cleaning, I have to admit, there was a sincere "well played, sir."
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
3 days, 10 hours agoView original
21
Happy Christmas, Rachel
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 week, 4 days agoView original
1
Fashion tip for heterosexual males: Tasteless as it is to wear a "Boobies Make Me Smile" shirt, it's even grosser if *you* have boobies.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 week, 4 days agoView original
16
God bless us, every wii.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 week, 4 days agoView original
6
Rejoice, for unto us a Wii is given!
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
1 week, 4 days agoView original
9
I'm sensitive, so I named my vagina after a Dylan song, "Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands." (Where sad-eyed prophets say/ that no man comes)
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
24
C-minus sappy line: "It's like I've been stacking blocks all my life, building, waiting- and you're the long piece that gave me my Tetris."
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
14
...wow, that tweet was *way* more effective at getting people to unfollow me than ANY of @unfollowme's tweets.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
2
And, more sentimentally, the wishing-someone-was-here-to-see-this-dook way, and the masturbating-ALL-the-time way [1,361]
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
9
I'm one of those who's "single" when the SO's gone, but less in the cheatin'-ho way and more in the eat-over-the-trash-in-my-underwear way.
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
33
@aedison ACTUALLY I help people who help people who help people who help people with AIDS. Takes the sting out of: my life, your tweet, AIDS
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
2
Is there a firewall to let me view ONLY email and sites relevant to my current project? Also to get me to care enough about my job to do it?
EffingBoring (Rachel) from Brooklyn, NY, USA
2 weeks, 3 days agoView original
8