I'm going to bed at 8:15 and no amount of ridicule can stop me.
Except that. Don't...well fuck you, now I'm staying up til 8:30.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
3 hours, 32 minutes agoView original
Things not write inside a card, no matter how well intended the sentiment may be: "I hope knowing you makes it worth mourning you."
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
4 hours, 53 minutes agoView original
@warmyellowlight Oh, least favorite word ever is MOOT. Saying it sounds like you're somewhere between retarded and drunk.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
6 hours, 1 minute agoView original
@gordonshumway My sister sells Avon. Todd made her a pink shirt that says "Mary Kay is a whore."
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
6 hours, 6 minutes agoView original
High school is offering seminar "Are your kids having too much fun in school?" Judging by my son's attitude every morning, I'll go with NO.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
6 hours, 11 minutes agoView original
@fireland So, you're wearing a onesie and a diaper? You free tonight?
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
6 hours, 44 minutes agoView original
I want a cigarette so bad I can taste it.
I should probably stop snorting the ashtray.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
7 hours, 3 minutes agoView original
@MsNovember @TimmerTDB Yes, it's true. I am Steve Jobs. The empty wallet and Hamburger Helper dinners are just a front.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
7 hours, 6 minutes agoView original
By the way, a hormone imbalance has been robbing me of my very last shred of sanity. I'll issue a press release tomorrow.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
7 hours, 15 minutes agoView original
@coyotesqrl BRITNEY SPEARS IS GAY AND BILL OREILLY HAS A VAGINA.
Did I do that wrong?
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
7 hours, 24 minutes agoView original
Twitter has made it really hard to avoid answering emails.
"Oh, sorry, I wasn't online all day."
"But I saw you on twitter an hour ago!"
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
7 hours, 31 minutes agoView original
Why do you feel the need to start up a conversation with me from the next stall? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE TO FART IN PEACE?
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
9 hours, 55 minutes agoView original
@InsoOutso LEAVE BRITNEY'S VAGINA ALONE!
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
10 hours, 51 minutes agoView original
Rationally, I know the bathroom door handle's wet from washed hands. But I still freak the fuck out that I might have touched someone's pee.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
10 hours, 53 minutes agoView original
Not five minutes after I make a tweet mocking Facebook, I go and add a friend and change my status. Which is all I know how to do on FB.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
11 hours, 23 minutes agoView original
@Moltz Yes. Hit "delete my Facebook account" and you win!
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
11 hours, 27 minutes agoView original
@detweiler Looks like Fox News got phished. Juvenile as that tweet may be, it made me giggle to see it there.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
11 hours, 36 minutes agoView original
Thanks to my earbuds and Queens of the Stone Age for drowning out Monday and all its whining, bitching and shit, I can still hear her voice.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
12 hours, 5 minutes agoView original
Note to self: Ctrl-F does not work on paper.
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
12 hours, 17 minutes agoView original
@Kalli And wanting to smother Justin Timberlake in chocolate and go into a lick frenzy makes me womanly, right?
abigvictory (Michele ) from all up in your face
15 hours, 15 minutes agoView original
← Older